Updates from February, 2000 Toggle Comment Threads | Keyboard Shortcuts

  • Alex 6:13 pm on February 27, 2000 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: bad people, nuns   

    Jen: but would I be a bad person?
    Alex: no. you’ll have to do better than that.
    Jen: um….I recently robbed and pillaged a nunnery, and after I turned the nuns out completely nude, and sold the nunnery to a chain of grocery stores.
    Jen: “St. Albertsons”
    Alex: that’s pretty good,  but still far too funny.
    Jen: f*ck! maybe I’m one of those demented madmen who make jokes at inappropriate times?
    Jen: Why, just last week, I had Macguyver in a grain storage bin, and I made a joke, and distracted my evil henchmen, and he was able to make a rope of duct tape and climb to safety.

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  • Alex 2:10 pm on February 25, 2000 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: guns   

    Alex: You can’t play Russian Roulette with a cap gun, Sean.
    Sean: SURE you can, you just go deaf.

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  • Alex 7:19 pm on February 23, 2000 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , ,   

    Sean: Hello, this is professor klumfudder. i would like to file a complaint about one of your student presentors for my class. i think his name was Tommy Square or something. the point is, he came into the presentation stinking ass drunk. he slurred his speech, and when one of my students asked what your open hours were, he proceeded to moon them and slap his ass, saying “Here’s yo open hours ya dirty bastard!”

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  • Sean 7:58 pm on February 22, 2000 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: dinner, lists   

    Tod’s Fairwell Dinner – The little yellow sheet

    (all of these comments were written over the course of Tod’s dinner by the various people in attendence. since none of them are labeled, they are completely anonymous)

    • For a good time call 571-7557 (phil’s # during the summer)
    • I am an alien taken this paper form. Right now I am having sex w/your hand and I know you like it because you are smiling. 🙂
    • http://www.todsgoawaydinner.com
    • Do NOT be afraid to love the avocado.
    • you want a piece of me? i’ll kill ya! kill ya all!
    • I miss Alex W. at this end of the table. His charming smile melts my brain.
    • (commenting on above quote)
    • I am wearing polka-dot panties.
    • I’d smile if you’d touch me again.
    • I’m trapped in a Turkish prison. Help! Send brownies.
    • (commenting on above quote)
      I’m trapped in a turkish toilet…splash splash!
    • (commenting on above quote)
      I’m trapped in a Turkish whore. Bring the jaws-of-life.
    • How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
    • The people I work with are sick puppies. And I mean that in the nicest possible way.
    • suckers!
    • “No matter where you go, there you are.”
    • ok. here’s the deal. this is only a “work” function. get over it.
    • I’m squishing your head. I’m squishing your head.
    • Brandy is not a “shot taking” liquor.
    • I’m melting because I’m made of cheese.
    • press here.
    • The glass isn’t half empty, it’s just designed twice as big as it needs to be.
    • I am the outsider.
    • Minni-me you complete me!
    • ?
    • none of this makes sense.
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  • Alex 9:20 am on February 20, 2000 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: immortal, skating   

    Sean: If I were immortal, I’d become the best skater in the world cause I wouldn’t spend time doing anything else.
    Alex: Where would you get money to live?
    Sean: Dude, I’d be immortal. You don’t see any poor immortals around, do you?!
    Alex: I don’t…. immortals…. I….

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  • Alex 4:21 pm on February 18, 2000 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: sappy   

    Sean (on being a sappy person in a bad mood): And I’m pissed off… that there aren’t more butterflies in the world, damnit!

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  • Alex 10:32 am on February 10, 2000 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , ,   

    Sean: … It’s like making webpages, ya know? It’s easy, but it takes a long time.
    Jen, Alex, Phil: * mocking, non-understanding laughter *
    Sean: *upset* But, KILLIN’! that’s quick… it’s just disposing of the body that takes time.

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  • Alex 7:55 pm on February 7, 2000 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: ,   

    Alex: I don’t want the frosting to get on the napkin.
    Jen: I don’t care where it goes as long as it ends up in my mouth at some point.

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  • Stevem 11:03 am on February 3, 2000 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: pearl harbor   

    (after andy claimed he was responsible for the pearl harbor attack, coincidentally (sp?) on his birthday)
    Wes: Andy, you weren’t even a twinkle in someone’s twinkle then!

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