(Heard by people in the lobby while I was complaining about an upgrade) Me: I don’t want to spend Friday night waiting for some dude to call!
Author Archives: Anonymous
Restrain the One You Love
DEM0NH00D: pretty cheap averybridgette: whats cheap averybridgette: your prostitute? DEM0NH00D: yeah DEM0NH00D: she fell apart DEM0NH00D: i was disappointed DEM0NH00D: couldn’t even get my money back averybridgette: at least you have the sheep DEM0NH00D: i mean, that was bus fare averybridgette: and your handcuffs DEM0NH00D: the sheep will never leave me DEM0NH00D: because i have …
With Cinnamon
Tobin: Mmm, dick bread.
And Speedy
Sean, while wearing black clothes, hockey skates and a ski mask: “This is what’s called my friendly look. I think it says ‘Hey, I’m approachable.’”
Shoe Fetish Beginnings
Alex: Is it possible to fall in love with something you’ve worn on your feet? Cause that’s what I’m feeling right now.
But I Ain’t Free
Naseem: I don’t cost any money.
All About Boob
Christine- I recognize you by the shape of your chest.
Computer Comfort
Christy: i don’t believe in human contact. that’s why i work in a computer lab.
Beasts
Anonymous: Oh yeah. It’s time to put the beast back in bestiality.
Nuts
Debbie: What do you think about Brazilian nuts? Christy: I don’t know. I never had a Brazilian.
Ok Then
Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, …
Just Sometimes?
Sometimes I wish I wore diapers. — Christy
Storytime is Over
(excerpt from the critically acclaimed short, “NeXT Storage: The Velvet Underbelly”) Sean: You were sitting on the beach. Reading? Christy: Well, yes. I was searching for the intellectual short beachgoer… (time passes) Christy: He was suckling the child to his womb. Sean: So then he was kind to small children? Wait. That’s disgusting! -Anonymous
I Left My Email There
USER: I am having problems with my email. MIKA: What is your address? USER: 6### Del Playa.
Solved!
Email from user: From: *******@mcl.ucsb.edu To: lopaka@mcl.ucsb.edu Subject: Help How do I send an email?
Everyone
USER: Who is ‘Login’?
Motivate Us
SCs: “We need motivation.” Andy: (with his mouth full) “Hey, I’m eatin’ here.”