*bored at work, singing garth brooks* alex: “troubles I forgot ’em, I buried ’em in the sand. So bring me two pina coladas…” *pause* alex: line? tobin: “heeeeey macarena!”
Yearly Archives: 2001
McFly
alex: We need an office skateboard here like we had at IC. tobin: Dude, this is the Institute for Theoretical Physics… we need an office hoverboard!
Motorcycling
(As we view Wes from the car behind, he takes the opportunity to meticulously adjust his leather jacket while at a stop light on his motorcycle) Sean (in flighty Wes voice): Oh my, does this jacket make my ass look big?
Not a Disney Fan
bored at work, alex sings the mickey mouse club song hoping for backup from sean alex: M I C… sean: r o p h o n e? alex: K E Y… sean: m a s t e r? alex: M O U S E! sean: e r c i s e!
Sinking Feeling
while on a work-out kick alex: I’m going to go get the weights out of the shed in back. stevem: Why, is it getting too heavy?
Snails Take it Slow
sean:… then a snail spoke to me in latin. then i wet myself. then the story ended. did the snail speak to you too alex: he’s speaking to me right now. he says you were a good lay. tobin: wow, he really puts the “go” in escargot!
Or Harlots
ive got 4 or 5 girls that want to play. the only stipulation is that they are to be referred to as my harem. – steve
Ba-Bad
while playing super mario brothers 3 alex: a ba-bomb! *grabs ba-bomb*. let’s go, ba-bomb! *alex dies holding a ba-bomb* billy: you ba-blew it! all: *painful groan* billy: oooo ba-billy…
Tripping on Turkey
(theorizing on why Sean had a strange hallucination the morning before) JennH: You must have eaten something bad. Sean: i figured that i was either hallucinating or i had become a very powerful warlock in my sleep JennH: Like week old milk or something. Sean: no dairy products either, although i had fast food for …
Why Beat Them Though
sean: we’re good. alex: TOO good. sean: if we were any gooder, we’d have to beat the women off with a stick. and i don’t mean ‘that’ stick.
He Never Wears Pants
alex: some like it hot but some sweat when the heat is on. tobin: some like it cold but some shiver when their pants are gone.
Fat and Wooden?
(also from the little yellow sheet at Jen’s b’day.) (Tobin’s seemed inable to come up with something funny for the sheet. So someone wrote a theory about why that was the case..) Tobin’s got writer’s cock. childish, yes, but it’s even funnier because someone thought this phrase important enough to write it on the same …
No Maps Though
(from the little yellow sheet at Jen’s b’day.) (in regards to Gabe’s much maligned major) So, if a geography major gets lost, does he get kicked out of the major? –sean No, they just give him a rock hammer and call it close enough. –anon
K-Y Ad
(After a commercial for K-Y Jelly.) Jen: K-Y Jelly, for when you just don’t do it for her. Alex: But still want her to do it for you.
Poo
sean: something should happen tonight alex: your words reach deep and question the very fabric of our frustrating miniature human existance sean: you coulda said poo alex: and now i wish i had sean: but you didn’t and poo still came out
Always Bet on Blood
(on the movie “Art of War” Jen: Half man, half vampire, Wesley Snipes is Vampire 57!
Words are Fun
sean: I’m not into exactities. or real words either
Mirrors are Hilarious
alex: I just laughed at myself. sean: Oh the glory of mirrors. *pause* alex: Mirrors? … jerk!
Both at Once?
(after an advertisement on tv for some new medicine) alex: I hate when depression medicine gets in the way of my sex. sean: i hate when sex gets in the way of my depression