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Security Killing

Sean: Do you think a moth would set off the sensors?… cuz I had to kill one the other night just to make sure.

Posted byChristyOctober 1, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: bug ninjaLeave a comment on Security Killing

We <3 Shin Kicks

Sean: We should have a contest here at the IC.  Give prizes to the tallest and shortest consultants. David D.: What kind of prizes? Sean: We can buy the shortest person some elevator shoes. David D.: And kick the tallest person in the shins? Sean: Naturally.

Posted bySeanSeptember 30, 1998February 5, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: prizes, violence, workplacesLeave a comment on We <3 Shin Kicks

Hip Yip

Ray:  Debbie Yip, stop trying to be hip.

Posted byMikeoSeptember 28, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: rhymesLeave a comment on Hip Yip

Ok Then

Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, Gimp, …

Continue reading “Ok Then”

Posted byAnonymousSeptember 1, 1998February 5, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: gimpLeave a comment on Ok Then

More of a Fascist

Andy (to Christy): Why red? Why you like red so much…you a commie?

Posted byChristyAugust 30, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: politicsLeave a comment on More of a Fascist

Eunuchs Gone Wild

Sean: Yup. Eunuchs are coming back in a big way. Mike: …Isn’t that what the new Mac OS is based on? Sean: You mean UNIX?

Posted byChristyAugust 25, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: neuter, unixLeave a comment on Eunuchs Gone Wild

Stop. Slobbertime

Josh: Where’s the line drawn between attraction and sexual harrassment? Christy: When you drool on them. Mike: Yeah, now that’s love.

Posted byChristyAugust 19, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: rules of attractionLeave a comment on Stop. Slobbertime

One With Nature

HIKE QUOTES: Kashyap: (lagging behind) If they clap when we get back I’m gonna kick their ass. Christy: (tripping up the path) I can’t laugh and hike at the same time! Mike: You need to learn to multitask. Are you thristy yet? -Alex’s sign, found by Christy of all people No! Don’t go upstream! -Everybody …

Continue reading “One With Nature”

Posted bySeanAugust 12, 1998February 5, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: hike, pee, spellingLeave a comment on One With Nature

ADD Theater

Debbie: (playing with the dirty yucky slug) God, I almost want to eat this stuff…just to taste it….Has anyone TRIED to wash this? (then she proceeded to make it dance.)

Posted byChristyAugust 3, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: inedible, slugsLeave a comment on ADD Theater

So Many Choices

I like cheese that tastes like ass. -Debbie

Posted byChristyJuly 28, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: assLeave a comment on So Many Choices

Evil is so Subjective

I heard a rumor that you’re pure evil…is this true? -Sean

Posted byChristyJuly 26, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: pure evilLeave a comment on Evil is so Subjective

16 Shades of Naked

There ain’t nothin’ in the world like 16 color porn. -Sean

Posted byChristyJuly 25, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: geek, pornLeave a comment on 16 Shades of Naked

Pscyh!

I think women get into psych because they have some fundamental pathology they think they can solve themselves. (points at Christy) Case in point. -Matt D.

Posted byChristyJuly 19, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: psychLeave a comment on Pscyh!

Is This the Matrix?

This is all in my head you realize. This isn’t real. -Andy

Posted byChristyJuly 15, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: realityLeave a comment on Is This the Matrix?

Just Sometimes?

Sometimes I wish I wore diapers. — Christy

Posted byAnonymousJuly 12, 1998February 5, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: diapers, peeLeave a comment on Just Sometimes?

Lazy Going

That is the ultimate in not wanting to get out of your damn chair…Damn, you’re lazy.  – Sean (to Christy)

Posted byChristyJuly 10, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: slackersLeave a comment on Lazy Going

Storytime is Over

(excerpt from the critically acclaimed short, “NeXT Storage: The Velvet Underbelly”) Sean: You were sitting on the beach. Reading? Christy: Well, yes. I was searching for the intellectual short beachgoer… (time passes) Christy: He was suckling the child to his womb. Sean: So then he was kind to small children? Wait. That’s disgusting! -Anonymous

Posted byAnonymousJuly 1, 1998February 5, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: gross, storyLeave a comment on Storytime is Over

Filthy Mice

Debbie: You know what they say about a dirty mouse? Christy: What, you have to wash it out with soap? Rob M. (to the mouse): You’re naughty.

Posted byChristyJune 28, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: naughtyLeave a comment on Filthy Mice

Plus, Fake Noses

Me and Michael Jackson you know (indicates her blotchy colored arm) – and we both like little boys – Debbie Yip

Posted byChristyJune 28, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: celebritiesLeave a comment on Plus, Fake Noses

People Watch Parades?

Ray – It’s the oldest carriage horse parade in the country. Christy – Gee. Ray – You do have to have cultural empathy.

Posted byChristyJune 27, 1998Posted inUncategorizedTags: cultureLeave a comment on People Watch Parades?

Not Chocolate

How did I get chocolate there? [smells pant leg] ….. Is that chocolate? -Anonymous Office Staffer

Posted bySeanJune 26, 1998Posted inUncategorizedTags: foodLeave a comment on Not Chocolate

So Smooth and Fatty

Matt D. – How does this program flow? Debbie  – Like butter baby.

Posted byChristyJune 26, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: foodLeave a comment on So Smooth and Fatty

What’s in a Title Though?

Christy: Why don’t you become a consultant? Debbie:  I don’t know…I don’t really like to deal with people. Christy: Debbie, you’re a receptionist!

Posted byChristyJune 24, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: workplaceLeave a comment on What’s in a Title Though?

Service Lottery

That’s my new customer service technique: for every other call I hang up on them.  – Tod

Posted byChristyJune 24, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: good serviceLeave a comment on Service Lottery

I Left My Email There

USER: I am having problems with my email. MIKA: What is your address? USER: 6### Del Playa.

Posted byAnonymousJune 23, 1998Posted inUncategorizedTags: college, emailLeave a comment on I Left My Email There

Fresh Check

“Stop squeezing my fruit!”  –Christy

Posted byLopakaJune 22, 1998February 2, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: boobsLeave a comment on Fresh Check

SexEd Deficiency

“And I have no idea which hole to plug it into…” – Chris L.

Posted byChristyJune 21, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: oops, sexual dysfunctionLeave a comment on SexEd Deficiency

Blocks FTW

I am the tetris fucking master. – Matt Dunham

Posted byChristyJune 21, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: cursing, games, tetrisLeave a comment on Blocks FTW

Sweet Veggies

“Coleslaw is God’s way of saying, hey, add some sugar to that cabbage.” -Lopaka

Posted byChristyJune 20, 1998January 30, 2010Posted inUncategorizedTags: foodLeave a comment on Sweet Veggies

Solved!

Email from user: From:      *******@mcl.ucsb.edu To:        lopaka@mcl.ucsb.edu Subject:   Help How do I send an email?

Posted byAnonymousJune 19, 1998Posted inUncategorizedTags: email, smartLeave a comment on Solved!

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