Hand Over the Lunch Money

SMcGheek: randall is one big nerd: http://www.isber.ucsb.edu/~randall/l400/

SMcGheek: he got that computer today.

JenRHock: randalls such a big nerd, even I wanna beat him up and take his lunch money.

SMcGheek: well put

SMcGheek: i might have to quote you on that

JenRHock: thats fine. that nerd compiled his own custom kernel.

JenRHock: he should be warned the beating is coming. 😉

SMcGheek: but somehow cant seem to make a link to show it off. lame nerd.

JenRHock: his nerdness has no staying power.

Bada Boom

Lora: fake boobs just walked in the library. she is very perky.
Alex: would fake boobs WALK into a place, or bounce into a place?
Lora: strut i think. boom bada boom bada boom.
(and sometime later…)
Alex: fake dick just walked into work. followed by his friend, real asshole.
Sean: are they into one another?
Alex: sort of in an out. very cyclical

Terminal Velocities

Narfa5 (2:46:57 PM): stupid physics lab
Narfa5 (2:47:07 PM): it hates me and i hate it more
JenRHock (2:57:05 PM): i hate you too.
Narfa5 (2:57:38 PM): i think you and physics lab would get along well
JenRHock (2:58:46 PM): we should have babies.
Narfa5 (2:59:03 PM): mmm…little vectors
Narfa5 (2:59:42 PM): you could throw them off cliffs and they’d tell you what their velocity was at the time of impact
JenRHock (3:00:05 PM): you’d be a wonderful mother.

Peachy Preteens

the conversation

(after closing the window 3 times already)
(16:47:58) peachesNcreamez: really no joke whats your real name
(16:48:18) smcgheek: hey. im trying to get some work done here. would you mind not bothering me?
(16:48:56) peachesNcreamez: do you know katie
(16:49:22) smcgheek: go do some algebra homework
(16:49:30) peachesNcreamez: no
(16:49:35) peachesNcreamez: dont have any
(16:49:38) smcgheek: sorry, then do some phonics.
(16:49:46) peachesNcreamez: dont do that
(16:50:06) smcgheek: seriously, im at work. im glad youre home from school.

the user info

Username : peachesNcreamez
Member Since : Sun Jul 8 16:53:14 2001
Warning Level : 0 %
Online Since : Thu Sep 20 15:34:24 2001
Idle Minutes : 11

Hi to yall. I love Justin. you are my honey. i love you! :-*:-Pi miss you so much!

shoutouts to:
-everyone from the nationals pageant! we kicked ass out there girls!
liz,kate,maria,justin,jen,jill,alyssa,britt,kiley,paige, ellen, and anyone else i forgot. === sorry if i forgot you. all of you mean a lot to me!!!!!- of course that was all bull!
i love jagged edges new song “where the party at” and 112’s ” Peaches n Cream”

steve- do you have raceing sperm? lol
ellen- we need to get together and show steve and chris what its all about! lol
brenna- you me and gym class! lol

Emotional Rollercoaster

alexatitp: that is really weird
SMcGheek: yuppers
alexatitp: yuppers?
SMcGheek: yup
alexatitp: steve, is that you?
SMcGheek: ya
SMcGheek: i dont know what came over me. im sorry.
SMcGheek: [shame]
alexatitp: [embarrasment]
SMcGheek: [vengance]
alexatitp: [fear]
SMcGheek: [rage]
alexatitp: [dirty underpants]
SMcGheek: [slaughter]
alexatitp: [death?]
SMcGheek: [guilt]
SMcGheek: [denial]
alexatitp: [haunting]
SMcGheek: [acceptance]
alexatitp: [appearance at own funeral]
SMcGheek: [bewilderment]
alexatitp: [ascention]
SMcGheek: [praise]
alexatitp: [judgement]
SMcGheek: [damnation]
alexatitp: [satisfaction]
SMcGheek: [rage]
SMcGheek: [again]
SMcGheek: [st alex]
alexatitp: again saint alex? or against alex
SMcGheek: as in rage against the machine. st alex maybe too. creepy.
alexatitp: i hope we haven’t just sealed our fates
SMcGheek: god listens to aim conversations.
alexatitp: can god see me masturbate?
SMcGheek: only if you do it on aim
alexatitp: uh oh
SMcGheek: sinner.

Upstanding Citizens Part 2

(the night continues…see previous quote)

Samantha (fairly intoxicated): I give good head.
(everyone starts laughing)
Samantha: I do.
Jermaine: What?! No you don’t. You give shitty head.
(laughter grows)
Samantha: Not on humans. Duh. Animals. They’re much easier. With their little weewees.
Joe (laughing uncontrollably): Stop stop! I can’t handle anymore. No more animal sex!

Family Grabbag

Quotes from my family.

“Don’t trip over dead chickens”– (is that like ‘don’t cry over spilt milk’?)
-As I was taking out the trash, my father came home and this was the first thing he said to me, its hard to explain why.

“You big jew!”
-My 11 year old sister suddenly yelled this as I denied her a cookie. She claims she meant to say, ‘you big doofus’. Sure…

“I don’t like eating cole slaw in the dark”
-Another odd quote from my youngest sister, said during a bout of misguided energy conservation.